August 07, 2016

Recounting a mashup dream

I don't understand how my dreams are so absurdly random. If I could dream your dream, I would, because I want to know if yours too are this ludicrous.

Once, when I was a pre-teen or in my early teens, I had a dream that my sister and I are playing just outside our house in our township. I'm sliding down the flight of stairs that leads to the ground floor. Then suddenly a tiger pounces towards us. I'm scared to the bones and run for my life. So does my sister. But can anyone outrun a tiger? One leap—or two, I don't remember—and it stood in front of us, blocking our path. This pisses my sister off. She stops running and confronts the tiger. Not to fight with it, but to give it an earful in Hindi, complaining that it can't leap/jump/hop in this game if it wants to play with us. The tiger was not happy as the stipulation stripped him of this advantage. And in the dream, I was (a) relieved because the wild beast was not going to kill us, and (b) flummoxed because the tiger knew and spoke Hindi and wanted to play with us.

It just occurred to me that this, perhaps, is the oldest dream I remember. Hmmm... But yes, this is far from the most irrational. I have those dreams every once in a while where people from my college life or office life, including those I have never spoken with, would show up in the place I grew up and get involved in situations with me that are totally bizarre. Mind-boggling mish-mash. I once had Robert Vadra in my dream, talking to me about something in our Dehradun house. When I was in Bangalore, I had a dream that I'm being given a makeover for a fashion shoot. I categorise it as bizarre because I was being decked up as a woman. Long hair, light green colour satin salwar suit, make-up, heels. Vividly remember it. I get stupid dreams all the time.

The reason I am writing about last night's dream is that it was... Whom am I kidding! Because I saw my estranged daughter in my dream once again. Haha... Yes, I have a daughter. Almost 32 months older than I am. Haha... She's a dear friend whom I love too much and am so protective of. When she used to get annoyed with my overbearing concern, I used to explain (mind you, explain, not justify) it by keeping my hand on my heart and telling her it's a mother's heart. I did this antic a few times and she eventually warmed up to it. I was now her mom! Hahaha... Not every guy gets to experience the joys of motherhood! It was great, getting the privilege to love her and be her family. To be able to extend love and care was a priceless gift.

But as is wont, we fell apart. (I use the word "wont" because there's a pattern in my life. Every girl I become good friends with, we fall apart. No exception yet.) And we fell apart for good. A couple of months ago, she and her husband became parents of a beautiful, little girl that is her replica. Such a delightful occasion! I became a grandmom, after all! Hahaha...

It sucks that I was not a part of all this. It sucks that I'll never again be a part of her life and will not be able to hold the li'l baby in my arms. It sucks that she won't do susu-potty on me. I am eager to know how my friend, my daughter came to terms with the daily phenomenon of susu-potty-fart-burp-puking, something that's a part of every new parent's life. She's prickly about hygiene. It's only because of her throwing a fit every time I sat to eat without washing my hands that I... Ok, no. I still don't wash my hands if it's only rice that I'm having, as I use a spoon. But yeah, I did buy a bottle of sanitiser because of her, and it's quite handy. So how's this hygiene-conscious girl managing being peed on, having to clean potty multiple times a day? Ah, I'm missing so much!

Digression alert! This post was to be about the dream, not about somebody I used to know.

The mindless, mashup dream
Yeah, so from what I remember, this dream featured my sister and I again, in the township where we grew up. Outside the Experts' Club there. She was in some high-tech, futuristic super car at some distance from me. From the opposite direction, some Terminator-like assassin was fast approaching in a similar car. I was scared for my life. (Why is this dream similar to the tiger dream from childhood?) I told my sister I feared that guy and planned to run away. She advised against it, saying something like father has asked not to go. As it was a grave situation, I told her I'd give his instruction a pass this time. I ran and sat into my own futuristic car, which was parked only a few metres away. I took off, accelerating to the top speed within a few seconds of switching the ignition on. The Terminator guy was right on my heels.

It was a brown car. Dark brown. Mine, not his. In this chase, I could see my car like you'd see it in a car-racing game, like Need For Speed. So I'm driving at a tearing speed. Suddenly that video game-like view is replaced by the kind of view you'd see if you're actually driving. I'm concerned. Why did the view change? I fiddle with I don't know what, and it turns out that now I'm not in a car but merely running on the road in my township. The road is unusually crowded for a residential colony that my township is. The Terminator nabbed me. Only, turned out that he too was not in that futuristic, Transformer-type car I had first seen him in. He was on a motorcycle. Hero Honda Splendor or Passion something. And it was not that cold-blooded, poker-faced assassin I had first assumed it was. It was my school friend's neighbour whose default words are, "Chalo na, baithte hain." (Meaning, "Let's sit for a drink.") I too am friendly with this guy, in real life, but in the dream he held me by my collar and commanded me to come with him. I tried to talk myself out of it, but it didn't seem to work out. 

Same dream, different track
I say "seem to" instead of being sure because what happened next in the dream was a detour. Or track change. The whole Terminator chase thing is gone. Now my father is driving a car and I'm on the backseat. In our Balco township. On the same road where my sister had advised me not to flee. On this road, which leads to home from the Expert's Club, I'm looking out of the window. I spot a car in front of me. There are three women on the backseat and both are attending to the one in the middle, who looks like she's in pain. I notice that the middle one's clothes are the same as what my daughter is wearing in the lovely WhatsApp DP of her husband. My gaze is fixed at that woman. As she turns her face sideways, turns out that she is indeed my daughter! Their car stops in the lane where we live, bang in front of the block where my house is. My father happens to stop our car right behind where she is standing. Now there's no way I can get down without us seeing each other.

As I'm getting down, I'm thinking to myself if I should acknowledge her or just turn and walk away, given the bad blood between us. With the uncertainty prevailing, I get down and our gaze meets, we exchange formal pleasantries and she tells me that she had another baby 12 days after she had a daughter. In fact, they had brought the new baby home just now. I was like, "Hey, do you remember that when you had given me the news that you're gonna become a mom, I had asked if you're going to have twins?" (I had actually asked her that in real life.) She remembered me asking it and said she herself didn't know there'd be another baby. This one is unsually small, btw. We were wondering that her kids must be the only set of twins with a gap of 12 days between their birth.

And then I woke up. Phew! What irrational dreams I get! This has to be the second time I dreamt of my estranged friend in a fortnight. Really, sucks to have fallen apart. But snapping ties was the right thing to do. Well, the show must go on. We must move on.

This has been a rather long post. But it's OK. It's good to indulge myself every once in a while. Will skip my penchant to end articles with a one-liner because I have pressing tasks at hand. Like becoming the rockstar I'm meant to be.